Saturday, April 21, 2012

Seven Years in Heaven

Today is my seventh wedding anniversary. I'm married to the most wonderful man alive. Unfortunately, we can't be together for our anniversary. He's doing six months of military training in another state, and I'm very busy with other obligations this weekend. We just couldn't make it work out so that we could celebrate the day together.

I'm writing this blog to try and compensate a little bit for that fact. When we first got married, we set a goal that we would try and go on an overnight trip for every anniversary, even if it was just to a local hotel. We would paint "Just Married" on the back of the car and act like a couple of newlyweds. Obviously, that's not the kind of thing that works out every year, especially when you're married to an Air Force officer. There are times when he's just not around. We just have to do the best we can. So in honor of our anniversary, I'm dedicating a blog to my husband. It's literally the least I could do, but I couldn't stand to see the day go by without doing something.

Ben and I were married seven years ago in the Idaho Falls, ID temple. Because we were married in the temple, that means we were sealed together for time and all eternity. I know a lot of my non-Mormon friends will be a little bit baffled by that terminology, so in case they read this, I'll try to explain. In Matthew 16:19 it says, "And I will give unto thee the keys of the kingdom of heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven."

The keys of the kingdom is referring to the priesthood of God. It's the same priesthood that the prophets had, that the Savior Himself used. It's the power of God on earth. After Christ's death and the deaths of the apostles, there was chaos, and men lost the priesthood. It was taken from the earth. The teachings of Christ were mingled with the opinions of man and turned into something new. Different, opposing churches - all of whom professed to follow Christ - popped up, teaching different doctrine from one another. No one seemed able to agree. Even today, few churches agree on what they believe. There are even people of the same congregations who believe different things from one another. There's a lot of confusion.

Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints believe that in the 1800's, the priesthood was finally restored. We believe that God chose a new prophet to restore Christ's church to the earth. His name was Joseph Smith. And under Christ's direction, the gospel - Christ's gospel, the same one He taught during His ministry - was returned to the earth. And with the gospel, the priesthood.

If it seems confusing or far-fetched, I understand. But I believe that God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. If He could choose prophets to do His work, give people direction and revelation, and perform miracles among men in the past, why would He cease to do so today? I don't believe He would. I believe that the heavens are still open, and that God still takes a direct hand in the teaching and leading of His children. I believe that prophets still exist today. I believe that Christ Himself leads our church, through direction given to His prophet, currently Thomas S. Monson. And I believe that President Monson holds the priesthood. All worthy men in our church are able to receive and use the priesthood. My father has it. My brothers have it. And my husband has it. Having the priesthood in my home has been an incredible blessing. I can't tell you the number of times that it has helped our family, from helping me receive guidance from the Lord, to healing me or my family members when we've been sick.

If you have any questions about it, or about any aspects of our faith, I would encourage you to go to mormon.org. On that website, regular, everyday members of our church share their testimonies and offer explanation for any questions you may have. We don't know if you've looked at the site, we won't be tracking you down. ;) It's just a way for you to get some honest answers to your questions without having to talk to a live, in-your-face person. It's completely anonymous for people who visit the website. And if you don't know about the church, I would encourage you to check it out. There are a LOT of misconceptions about us out there, and we're not afraid to let people know what the truth about us is. We'd rather people were truly informed about us, than have all those crazy rumors circulating! If you want to see my page, it's http://mormon.org/me/512Z/. Feel free to look around!

Anyway, because we have the priesthood, eternal marriages are possible. When we get married in the temple, by someone with the proper priesthood authority, our marriage does not only bind us to one another on earth, it binds us in heaven. Just as it says in Matthew! We call it being "sealed" to each other. And because our union is sealed, any children we have will also be sealed to us.

It's one of the most incredibly beautiful aspects of the gospel! Families can - and will! - be together, as family units, FOREVER!!!! God gave us our families for a reason. He knows that families should be about love. He loves us, and He wants us to have joy. How can we have joy in the life to come if we're separated from our families? Can you imagine getting to the other side with your spouse and children, and being told, "Sorry, they're not your spouse and children anymore. That family bond you had is over. Consider yourselves friends and acquaintances now"? That wouldn't be heaven! That would be hell!!! Heaven isn't heaven unless I have my family with me. And because I was sealed to my family in the temple on my wedding day, as long as we live righteous lives, I will be with my family for eternity! Ben will always be my husband, and Evie will always be my daughter. She'll have her own husband and children, of course, but she will still be my daughter, just as I am my parents' daughter. My heart is overflowing with joy, just thinking about it! God is good! He knew exactly what would make us the most happy when He arranged His great plan for us all. I'm so grateful to Him for His goodness, and I am forever in His debt.

My husband is the best person I've ever known. And I've known a lot of people. I've lived all over the world. I've met all types of people, in all kinds of places. And hands down, my husband is by far the most incredible man alive. It's so hard being separated from him, I'm not going to lie. The worst, of course, is when he deploys. Sending him off into danger is never an easy thing. But at least I can rest a little easier in the knowledge that, even if something terrible happens to him, he will forever be my husband, and I will forever be his wife. Our union will carry on through eternity.

It kind of makes "'til death do you part" sound like a bit of a curse, doesn't it? If you knew that marriages could continue on for eternity, would it be enough to settle for this life, and this life only?

Not for me.

I love my husband. He's selfless, patient, kind, sweet, handsome, smart, and talented. He treats me like a queen, and looks at me as if I were the most beautiful creature alive. He shows his love in millions of little ways every day. He's an incredible father, too. I know that Evie sees how Ben treats me, and will want the same thing for herself when she gets married. He's setting the bar very high for her future boyfriends, and I wouldn't have it any other way! Evie deserves nothing less.

Ben is my better half. He makes me a better person. He completes my soul. He fulfills the deepest desires of my heart. I can't imagine eternity without him, and I'm so grateful that I don't have to.

I love you, Ben. Happy anniversary.



Sunday, April 15, 2012

All the Drama

Being an adult, I've decided, is exhausting. At least, being an adult who has a social life is exhausting.

I'm not talking about partying until the wee hours of the morning. I don't really do that anyway. I'm talking about all the drama that goes on between people.

I go to church. I have all my life. And the people I attend church with are, for the most part, wonderful. They're caring, kind, and look out for each other. But every once in a while, stuff happens between people. Bad feelings come up. And the drama begins.

I try to avoid the conflict. I don't listen to the "he says/she says." No one gossips to me, and I'm grateful for that. But I still see the effects of the bitter feelings, the heartache and pain.

It stresses me out.

Seriously, people, we're supposed to be better than this! We're supposed to live Christlike lives, and try to emulate Him! The backstabbing and gossip has GOT to STOP!!!!

Now, don't get me wrong. I know that most people at church are there for the right reasons, and trying to live their lives the right way. They're good, decent, hardworking people. But when drama like this crops up, you can feel it spreading almost like a poison through the whole group. It raises everyone's stress levels big time. People start whispering behind backs. Strong opinions are formed with little information. It brings the entire group down, down, down - even those who are trying to avoid all the conflict.

I'm one of those. I don't want to deal with the pettiness! So I'm taking a stand, and asking all of you to do as President Uchtdorf told us to in his General Conference talk. "When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, or wanting to cause harm, please apply the following:

"Stop it!"

Seriously! We're adults! It's time to stop acting like middle-schoolers! Taking a stab at someone else is NOT going to make you feel better! Spreading rumors won't bring you satisfaction! Sharing gory details of other people's pain and suffering won't make your life seem better! It will just make you more bitter and miserable!

And this goes for everyone involving themselves in the drama, not just the people who are right in the middle of it. Everyone needs to learn to be a little kinder, a little more forgiving, a little more Christlike.

For those right in the middle of it all, though, I get that it's the hardest for you. But YOU can choose how you're going to handle it! If you're dealing with a lot of negative feelings, the best way to deal with it is to take it to the Lord and let Him heal your wounds. Let Him carry you for a while. It probably won't happen right away, but you'll definitely notice that you're more at peace. You'll be less inclined to lash out at others, and have an easier time forgiving those who hurt you.

Even if you're incredibly mad at the other person, if you turn to God and let Him take away your anger, you'll not only feel better, you'll become a better person.

It's really your choice. When we're given a trial in life, we can choose one of two paths: We can let that trial bring us down, make us miserable, and put us a little bit more in Satan's grasp; or we can let that trial make us stronger, more faithful, and closer to God.

Life isn't easy. Heaven knows, we all go through some seriously crappy stuff. But how we deal with that stuff determines what kind of people we become.

Personally, my goal is to become as much like Christ as I possibly can. I can't do that if I'm letting my pain and challenges bring me down. And neither can you.

In conclusion, I repeat those wise words from President Uchtdorf:

"STOP IT!!!"

I'm Cassie Fifield, and I approve this message!!!