The Worst Words

I've noticed a disturbing trend lately. Although I know it's been going on for a while, I first really noticed it with Colton on Survivor, who, if you've watched this season at all, you know is pretty much the worst human being on the planet. He insults people based on their race, financial status, physical defects, intelligence, you name it. And he frequently does it to their faces. He also spends so much of his time rolling his eyes at other people's comments that I'm worried his eyes will eventually fall out of his skull. Well, not so much worried. It would really serve him right.

But one of the things I noticed him saying a few times was, "Go kill yourself."

I was horrified. It was one of the most insulting, heartless, terrible things I had ever heard another person say. And it's not like he just said it once! He said it multiple times, to (or about) multiple people! Which suggests that this isn't just a one-time, emotion-fueled insult. He actually makes a habit of saying it to people whom he dislikes or disagrees with. He's almost casual about it.

Then, reading comments online lately, someone POSTED that very same thing in response to another poster who they probably had never met or interacted with before! They had a difference of opinion, so the one told the other to go kill herself.

Again, the casualness of the whole exchange screams of habit. I can't imagine saying it to another human being a single time, much less saying it so often that you think it's no big deal!

I'd heard stories about bullies saying that kind of thing to other kids in school. That was awful enough, but hearing grown men and women say it to each other now just infuriated me. Shouldn't we have grown past that kind of casual evil as we grew up???

I mean, think about it. Are there any worse words you can say to another person? It's not a threat, because you're inferring that the person you're insulting isn't actually worth your time or energy. You would never act violently towards them. They're not worth it. But at the same time, they clearly are so awful and undeserving of anything good that they should really just do everybody a favor and end their own life. It comes with the implied message, "No one will miss you. If anything, they'll be relieved that you're gone."

It makes me so sick and furious that I'm shaking just thinking about it. And this trend of casual cruelty is becoming very prevalent in our society, sick as it is.

I was watching a preview for the documentary "Bully," which follows several children through school as they're tormented by bigger, meaner kids (and even sometimes teachers). One of the story lines is about a little boy who was teased and tormented in school. One of the things he was told repeatedly by his classmates was, "Go kill yourself."

So he did.

He was eleven years old.

Eleven! He was just a baby! He was barely out of elementary school, if that! The fact that this sweet little boy chose to end his own life because of the torment he was going through with his peers devastates me.

And the fact of the matter is this: If people hadn't been repeatedly telling him to kill himself, and inferring such disdain and indifference about his existence... do you think he would have committed suicide?

My guess would be no.

In case any of my readers have any doubt about the matter, let me clear it up for you now. It is NEVER, in ANY situation, or to ANY kind of person, appropriate to tell someone to go kill themselves. IT IS NEVER OKAY!!!

I don't care how much you dislike a person, or how mad they make you, or how terribly they treat you. If they're genuinely threatening your life, that's different. If you're in danger, you of course should defend yourself however necessary. But saying "go kill yourself" isn't a defense mechanism. It's sole purpose and design is to make someone feel so unworthy, so unloved, so unimportant, that they no longer want to live.

I repeat, it is NEVER okay.

And heaven help anyone I hear saying that to another person. I don't care if you're my child, or someone else's child, or a freaking adult who ought to know better. I will rip you a new one. It takes a lot to set me off on a person, but that would absolutely do it. It's the most cruel, callous, evil thing one person can say to another. And I will not stand by and let it go unanswered.

And I hope that all of you will join with me in taking a stand against this and every other kind of torment. The reason people get bullied and mistreated is because no one is willing to stand up and fight for them. If you see someone at school, church or work being treated badly, make an effort to befriend them. Even if they smell weird, or act weird, or don't look very nice. We are all God's children, and all of our lives have worth. And if anyone needs the joy and love that comes with friendship, it's those who are scorned and tormented on a regular basis. Don't sit silently by and watch it happen. Have the courage to stand up for those who can't stand up for themselves.

And please, PLEASE teach your children that they should NEVER tell another person to "go kill themselves". Let's end this trend of casual cruelty, and do everything in our power to ensure that it never happens again.